(REPOST FROM AUG. 17, 2011) Mind or Food?

Happy Monday!  So I found this old post from exactly 4 years ago when I partnered with Jenny Craig for a 6 week program.  Reading my thoughts during this time was very interesting and I figured I would share them again because I think many of you can relate AND because I thought it would be a way for you to see how far I've changed mentally as it relates to my struggle with weight.  I italicized one section in particular for you that stood out the most for me.  I hope this motivates you to keep going and to even document your journey (even if its just for yourself.)
Hi all! I recently started the Jenny Craig weight loss program through a Blogher program that I signed up for.  I started on Sunday to be exact.  Let me start this post by giving you a information about myself
(my breakfast the other morning)
On Saturday when I went to the center to get started, I weighed in at 278lbs (GASP)
I’m 5’5 and 278lbs… That would put me in the obese category, right? Right.
(in Lane Bryant trying on a size 20 dress)
Now, let me say, I’ve never been thin.  In high school I was around 165 and 170, which was perfect for me.  By the time I was 21, I was around 200lbs.   After giving birth to my first son, I weighed in at 225, but I lost those 25lbs plus 2lbs so I was 198.
(on the way to my prom wearing a size large dress from the junior department)
Moving on to present day, I have 3 children a husband, a house, and a life that I’m trying to get back in order.  My first day on the program (Sunday) proved to be a challenge.  I’ve always known that I was an emotional eater.  But Sunday showed me that it’s worse than I thought.  Every time I am frustrated, overwhelmed, upset, irritated, rushed, sad, depressed, even happy, I want to put something in my mouth (ughhh, I hope that didn’t come across nasty!).  Here’s the thing, I AM NOT HUNGRY when I want to eat the food.  What does that mean???
***I’m realizing that in order to get a handle on my weight, I need to first get a handle on my life.  It’s not the food for me.  I don’t eat chocolate, I don’t drink alcohol (minus the three drinks I had during blogfest, YUM!), I don’t like pastries or sweets for that matter.  I’m not gonna sit here and say that I eat the healthiest foods out there, but I don’t eat the unhealthiest food either.  Even my portions aren’t large.  On the two trips I took to NYC, I realized that I ate better and not as much.  I didn’t feel the need to snack on anything.  Why is that?  Was it because I actually had time for me?  Was it because I had a few restful nights sleep?  Was it because I had more adult conversation?  Was it because I felt more like my old self?  Or maybe it was because I was constantly on the go.  I’m thinking all of those played a factor in why I didn’t over indulge myself when it came to eating. What I’m trying to do is figure out how to make myself feel and eat like that here at home.  Maybe my life is not balanced? Do I need a schedule perhaps? hmmm…
It’s now Wednesday and I must say that I have come to terms with the food I’m eating for the program.***
(Dinner last night)
  The food itself isn't bad (I was worried about that!).  It’s hard not tasting the food that I prepare for my family, but I don’t. 
I’m only doing this program for about 6 weeks.  I do hope to lose some weight, but not much. I am happy that I realized how bad my emotional eating is.  Hopefully by the time these few weeks are up, I’ll have more control of that.
How many of you ever struggled with weight? How are you dealing with it?  What have you learned about yourself when it comes to why your eating habits are what they are?



Noelle said...

I struggle with my weight too! Always have! I am an emotional eater, and when you have 5 kids, you experience all kinds of emotions all the time, seriously. But I have lost 42 pounds since February doing WW, I feel better, physically, and emotionally. I started walking which helps me deal with my emotions, It's not easy by any stretch of the imagination, but I knew i needed to finally do something for ME! You look good, and you are a very busy Mommy! Don't be hard on yourself, just think about you, in the choices you make, go for a walk, it really helps with your emotions!

I know, you could thrift when you get emotional.......:)

The Scott's Crib said...

I never had weight issues until I went to college...Most say you pack on the freshman 15, well I put more on like the freshman 30 or 40. I was getting three meals (good meals at that) a day at school and alcohol on the weekends. By time I turned 25 I was about 150 and in HS I graduated at 130. After getting married and having a baby I am up to 180. I have really had to come to terms that I will never be a size 7 again and Im only 27. I went on a diet probably about 3 years ago and I went at it hard and I dropped almost to 140 and I realized that I didnt look right (at all, I looked old for my age). It was then that I realized that as long as I maintain my current weight (it wouldn't hurt to lose a little) that I would be alright. My advice would be not to go with necessary the recommended weight catergories (because Im 5'3 and would be considered overweight but I don't look it) just focus on being and staying healthy and you'll be fine. Good luck and let us know how the program goes. I have only done weight watchers so it will be interesting hearing more about Jenny Craig.

Sing said...

It's good that you have identified the cause of the eating, that is the first step. I wish you well on your journey to better health and eating habits.
I love that chair, I see why you keep that place a secret ; )

Tonia said...

Being positive is the best way to tackle anything....and your secret place huh? Hummmm OK?

Decor & Harmony @ 4290 said...

Thanks for sharing and being honest. Losing weight and being active is a job in itself. Making time for yourself is the best thing you can do :) Where is this secret place?

Toni @ That's Beeutiful said...

I've always struggled with my weight and its always on my list of things "to do."

I have to say too; thank you for this post. Its hard to be honest with something that you need to do for yourself and I think this is the kick in the pants that I needed to focus on myself and my eating too.

Good luck and happy losing!

Shelly said...

Good Luck with your weight loss journey. Any major change in life starts with the mind and a "can-do" attitude. You possess that so I know you'll be successful. Love yourself NOW and for what's to come. TAKE TIME for yourself and you'll be the best you that you can be!

LilPeach (aka Laura) said...

Lakeitha, get ahold of a book called Women, Food and god by Geneen Roth, then find and like her on facebook. I've been a fan of hers for a number of years. Emotional eating will not go away with a diet. Her book(s) deal with the emotional aspect of eating and learning life strategies to deal with it and overcome it.

I'm right there with you, my friend!

Hugs! ♥♥♥

Shannon said...

You can do it Lakeitha! I'm so proud of you. We can't take care of the people we love until we take care of ourselves. Good luck and keep it up!

barbara@hodge:podge said...

Good for you! It's all about getting healthy:) Love the chair BTW!

Karen@StrictlySimpleStyle said...

It sounds like you have identified exactly what the cause is when you eat something when you're not really hungry. I think every woman can identify with emotional eating. As a busy mom and wife who is starting her own business you probably find "me" time a real challenge. Best of luck finding the balance in your life that you need.

Michelle Marsh said...

I think we can all relate to this post, especially if we have carried children and are making meals! Either way, you are so beautiful inside and out. This important step you have made is based on health, which is fabulous!! I too am in the same boat. I have started running just to be fit and more active (I have NEVER been athletic). My own frustration is that I am gaining lbs. but not eating more. The number on the scale is frustrating, yet I know what I am doing is best for me healthwise, so I keep going. When we have support from others, it really helps being motivated! Please keep posting your progress, it does help us all! Huge hugs to you, ~M.


Just hearing about you life would stress me out also. I know raising kids is the best job ever, but certainly not easy. What is easy is finishing up their food and then snacking at night, which is my worst time. I am proud of you for taking the first step...like Oprah said...first you have to own it....

Miss M&M said...

Thank you for your post and pictures. I too have struggled with my weight and while i've never been thin i've spent all of my adult life i've been obese. My journey began last July and so far i'm down 65lbs. I chose to have lap band surgery and many people are against WL surgeries but i knew for me that was my best option. Part of the process included counseling therapy which i was already doing and had already discovered i was an emotional eater. I still see my therapist which is key to me recognizing patterns. Good luck with your journey! One day i'm going to build up the courage to post before and after photos.

retrorevival.biz said...

Wishing you success with your weight loss goal:) BTW, I think that green dress looks fabu on you!


Mother of Vein of Galen Survivor said...

Your date look familiar!

lina123 Chen said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Nikki Dean said...

I'm an emotional eater and I hate it. I had it under control for a while but now I'm going through something and eating like crazy. Hopefully I'll get back on track this week.

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